It is a mitzvah for a Jew to marry and to live together with a spouse in a manner worthy of the traditional Hebrew designation for marriage, kiddushin, (to set apart for each other in a sanctified relationship). In Judaism, the decision to marry implies a willingness to enter wholeheartedly into a sacred covenant with another person.
All couples newly married by our clergy will be invited to join our congregation on a complimentary basis for the first year of their marriage.
Marriage Equality
Regardless of gender, our clergy will officiate at all wedding ceremonies under the same set of guidelines as described below.
Interfaith Marriage
We recognize that what a Jewish home and family looks like varies widely, and we embrace this diversity. Our clergy are happy to talk with couples about performing their wedding ceremony and are happy to work with you to accommodate your specific wishes.
The Wedding
Since a wedding is such a beautiful and exciting occasion, the congregation wishes to do all we can to make the event meaningful and enjoyable. Be in touch with the rabbi as soon as you know there will be a wedding in your family, so that they may share your joy and talk about timing and preparation.
Traditionally, Judaism forbids weddings during the three weeks between the 17th of Tammuz and the 9th of Av (a period usually in July or August) and during the period from the second day of Pesach until Shavuot. Reform practice is lenient with respect to both these periods. However, weddings generally do not occur on the High Holy Days, festival days, or Tisha b’Av (the 9th of Av).
Wedding ceremonies traditionally do not begin before the end of Shabbat. Couples wishing to be married on a Saturday evening should be in touch with the rabbi to consider timing early in the process.
Our sanctuary is a beautiful space for a wedding, and we look forward to talking with the couple about using our building. Our clergy can also perform wedding ceremonies at other local venues. Before any final plans are made it is important to set the date, time and place with the officiating rabbi. The rabbi will meet with the couple several times prior to the ceremony.
Aufruf – Prenuptial Blessing
On a Shabbat prior to the wedding the bride and groom can be called to the bima for special blessing. Traditionally, as the bride and groom leave the bima, they are showered with sweetness (soft candy) by the congregation. Schedule the aufruf in consultation with the rabbi.
Legal Requirements
A civil marriage license must be obtained prior to the wedding ceremony. Please contact the clerk’s office of the county in which you reside for the requirements in your county. If you are coming from out of state, contact the clerk’s office of the county in which the ceremony will occur.
The Ketubah – The Jewish Marriage Contract
The Jewish marriage contract must be signed by two witnesses. These witnesses should be Jewish and not related to the bride or groom, or related to each other. The rabbi can help with finding a ketubah, choosing a text, proofreading the Hebrew, and other details.
The Ceremony
The essence of a Jewish wedding ceremony is in the wedding vows, which are usually spoken both in Hebrew and in English by the bride and groom as the wedding rings are exchanged. There are also a series of blessings, two cups of wine or grape juice, symbols of joy, and breaking the glass at the end of the ceremony.
Personal Photography & Video
To honor the sanctity of the service, photos and personal videos are welcome during:
Ceremony Videography
Be fully present. Emanu-El provides multi-camera videography to capture your ceremony beautifully, ensuring these sacred moments are preserved for you to relive for years to come.
Music
Our rabbi and cantor can help guide music choices for the ceremony. Some couples choose to have Jewish music as part of the processional and recessional, and we are happy to work with couples on these choices.
Chuppah – Wedding Canopy
A Jewish wedding ceremony takes place under a chuppah. The Congregation has a beautiful huppah which is available for your use. The rabbi can help guide you on purchasing, creating, or borrowing a chuppah.
Reception
The executive director will be happy to give you information about the use of synagogue facilities.
Couples considering divorce are welcome to seek out the rabbi, who can meet with them and direct them to a professional counselor to help them with their differences. However, Judaism has allowed divorce from the earliest times.
Get – Divorce Decree
While traditional Judaism requires the obtaining of a religious divorce decree before a divorced person may remarry, the decision as to whether or not it is advisable to obtain a get should be made in consultation with the rabbi.